A couple days ago I received an e-mail regarding a little 9 year old girl who had been given only six weeks to live. She had been battling cancer for the last year or so and had seen signs of improvement, but just recently her health had dramatically deteriorated. Over the last year she's had an army of people (including my family) fervently praying for a miraculous recovery and the best cancer specialist working around the clock doing everything that they possibly can. And even though there is still a chance of a miraculous recovery (we know that with God all things are possible) I stared at the letter, and my mind started to question why God would let an innocent 9 year old girl go through this ordeal; how could He allow her to show brief signs of hope, only to have her situation be what it is today? I thought about her parents and the indescribable agony they must be going through. I sat there amazed at the seemingly immovable faith of her mom and dad in the face of an unimaginable tragedy. I wondered how I would react if my little girl was in the same situation. And I wondered aloud why God seems to rescue some from harm but not others. As my "why questions" mounted, I slowly realized that no matter how well I know the Bible, or how many seminary courses I take, there are some questions that I will never be able to fully and adequately answer. And to try to act like I have the answer would just be dishonest. Not an easy pill to swallow by any means.
I've heard many people say that the Bible is our "answer book". Just open it up and the answers you are looking for will finally be revealed. But what happens when the Bible doesn't give an answer that frees us from our questions? What happens then? Who is God then?
In Hebrew (the language in which God chose to reveal Himself to the world) the name of the first book of the bible, Genesis, is B'reisheet, which means "Beginning". This is also the first word in the book. Interestingly, just like English, the Hebrew "B" is the second letter in their Alphabet. (see title) The first God followers asked the question "Why would God choose the scriptures to begin with the second letter of the alphabet instead of the first?" Their answer was "To show that the Bible does not always answer every question, and that some knowledge is reserved for God Himself."
They also pointed out that the Hebrew letter "B" is closed on the right side, but open on the left. With the understanding that Hebrew is read from right to left, we can see that the Bible starts with a letter that is open in the direction that is being read, but closed off on the other side. A stark reminder that before anything was in existence - their was God. There is nothing wrong with asking the "why" questions of life. Many times that's what brings us into a closer relationship with our Creator. But we must always remember that God's understanding of the universe is beyond our comprehension. Sometimes we forget that God designed everything from the smallest neutron to the largest galaxies.
I pray that as we struggle with our questions, may we be O.K. with not knowing all of the answers, while resting in the knowledge of what we do know. His love.
As the apostle Paul says,
"I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor ruling spirits, nor things present, nor things to come, nor any powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is Jesus our Lord."